tumblrbot asked: WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT ON YOUR PLANET?
Panama City.
"A friend is one to whom one can pour out the contents of one’s heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping and with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away."
— Arab Proverb
Give yourself a break
I typically fill my days with lots of “doing” - working, working out, reading, writing blog posts, spending time with people, etc. I go on, and on, and on until one day, I just need a break. A big, long break. Like vegging in front of a TV, for hours on end.
I often feel guilty when I do this. I could find a million things to do instead - I can always think of things that need to be organized, projects that need to be completed, research that needs to be done, emails that need to be checked, whatever. But I just don’t want to lift a finger.
I had one of those I-need-a-break days yesterday. I felt guilty at first. For a few hours I kept thinking, “I could work out. I could organize papers in my office. I could pay some bills. I could go to a coffee shop (to change the scene.) I could take a walk.” I could, I should, I could, I should.
Then I realized that this anxiety won’t go away until I allow myself to have a rest day - until I stop beating myself up for watching yet another episode of Law & Order. This is simply what I want to do right now, and it’s okay.
Not only is it okay, it is crucial to allow yourself a break, to gather your energy, to rest your body and mind, because tomorrow you’ll be back to conquering your world.
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear."
— Ambrose Redmoon
Change the scene
Well, some days aren’t as great as others… Today I felt pretty good at first, then spiraled down. Perhaps it was because, as I found out later in the day, a friend of my boyfriend’s passed away from cancer. We’ve been waiting, checking several times a day for news of either his recovery or demise. He was 43 years old, with a loving wife and three kids…
Perhaps it was due to the position of the planets, as some would claim, or lack of sleep, or a busy day at work, or moodiness, or not doing something I’m passionate about, or… who knows, but it was one of those days.
One of those days when you just can’t get yourself to do much of anything after a certain threshold. You simply cannot motivate yourself, no matter how hard you try. Yet ultimately I was able to get out of this funk, thanks to Joel, the love of my life.
He called me up, and I hesitantly told him how I felt. His answer? “Let’s get you out of the house, change the scene, maybe have a glass of wine and conversation, anything that will get you out of this funk.” Yup, it always helps.
I found out recently that changing the scene is what does the trick for me. I had to get out of the house, have a glass of wine (or two :-) ), and have a conversation about our future and politics to get me out of the funk. I actually came up with some ideas.
Or I could have ended up on the bean bag in tears which has happened numerous times before. I must say that I prefer a glass of wine over a good conversation.
"Each indecision brings its own delays and days are lost lamenting over lost days. What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has magic, power, and genius in it."
— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1749-1832, Poet, Novelist, and Scientist
No magic pills
I was at a store one day telling a saleswoman who was taking my measurements that I recently lost some weight. She got very excited and asked, “How did you do it?! What did you do?” She was anxiously waiting for an answer with an eager look on her face. You know, the look that says, “Please tell me all about the latest magic pill you found!”
I answered, “Well, working out, eating better, the usual stuff.” You should have seen her face. It just sank… She said, “Oh.” Yep, not exactly what she wanted to hear.
There was a time when I, too, thought that you could just take a great leap forward. Say, you wake up one day and simply decide that you will be a very different person from now on. Just like that. A complete overnight transformation, the kind that makes your friends go “Is this really you?”
No such luck for me. When I tried it, I was very disappointed. I thought that I could change my behavior, habits, thoughts, outlook on life, physical body, family relationships, financial situation - everything - with just one, simple, big leap forward. Jump above everyone. Declare a “new” me, an entirely new life. Boy, was I hit with a dose of reality.
It may work for some people. Heck, some of us are going to continue to search for that magic pill or that magic bullet. Or try a big leap forward. For the rest of us, it’s one small step at a time - 5% improvements - that will slowly but surely lead us to our greater selves.
